You Know a Man By His Wallet
Have you ever left your wallet anywhere? Most of us have. The first thought is, “I hope that no unscrupulous busboy has rifled through it.” Then, we remember that we were only carrying a small amount of in this age of the debit card. That leads to a new worry: “I hope that the waitress is not a single mom who felt compelled to correct life’s unfairness by lifting a couple of my credit cards.” All of these thoughts are racing through our minds as we punch the restaurant’s phone number into our mobile and wait breathlessly for good news.
“Yeeeesss.” “Is this Chez Dominique’s?” “Yeess it is.” “Did you find a wallet in the booth by the corner window?” Then we hold our breath. If the maitre d’ says “Yes, it’s safe and sound,” we set up a time to swing by and recover the billfold that contains half of our lives. If he says, “No”, then we know that we have a bunch of credit card companies to call and we pray that their customer service lines are open 24/7.
Even when the guy at the restaurant says that someone has found our wallet, we don’t relax. What if that snotty-nosed busboy fingers a few bills before turning it in? What if that waitress that you should have tipped a bit more decides to get her revenge?
Then, when we pull up to the restaurant, walk inside and receive our wallet from a smiling hostess, we start to feel better. We open it up, try to remember how many credit cards we had, do the math and take comfort in the fact that there are still honest people in the world.
But do you have yet another nagging fear when you leave your wallet somewhere? I do. It’s called “What Will They Think of My Sweat-Soaked Crappy Wallet?” syndrome. Maybe you can relate.
When I inadvertently leave my wallet somewhere, I usually don’t worry too much about the cash and the cards. I have never had a problem with getting my wallet back intact. What I do worry about is what the wait staff thought of my wallet. Did they hold it like a rotted piece of garbage, using their middle finger and thumb as pincers as they tried not to become contaminated by it? Did they look at it and dare each other to pick it up? Did they conclude that I was an unemployed slob judging from my ancient wallet’s slovenly appearance?
You can tell a lot about a man by his wallet. Does he care enough about his accessories to always have a wallet that is in good shape? Does he buy the best, a wallet cut out of real leather or a durable animal skin? Is he the kind of guy who keeps a picture of his wife or receipts from the racetrack? Does he have business cards from local IT firms or calling cards for escort services?
You can tell a lot about a man from his wallet. That’s why Mustard makes a wide range of beautiful and durable wallets to keep the receptacle of your life looking fresh, clean and stylish. Their designs include everything from the British flag to a gaming console, all artfully splashed on their high-grade leather.
Don’t fret the next time you leave your wallet somewhere. It could be an unpaid advertisement for Mustard when the waiter finds it and says, “Wow! Nice wallet! What brand is this?” Posted by Roger Martin for Stand Out.